my friend & my daughter

My best friend in elementary school was a bit of a free spirit. She announced in second grade that, despite being called this for the past 7 years of her life, she would no longer be Jess. Don't even think about calling her Jess. She was now to be called Jessica and nothing else. When you ticked her off, you knew it. She loved doing artsy stuff. She drew designs all over her brand-name shoes and scribbled out those brand-names her parents had paid so much for. The second she was out of her mother's sight each morning, she shook her hair loose of its neat braids and let it fly in her face. Jessica tested into the gifted program but refused it when the teachers tried to tell her what to do.

I was the opposite. Not only did I follow every direction I was given in my elementary years, I could never imagine taking my pony tail down without my mom, a brush and a mirror. I was always drawn to Jessica, though, and even envious of her way of living life.

As different as we were, we were also inseparable for many years. We lived at each other's houses. Our families vacationed together. We knew every word to Bone Thugs & Harmony's Crossroads. In 7th grade, Jessica was about to fail Science so, despite the fact that I was getting an A, she spent the night at my house on a school night and we spent the entire time doing an extra credit project together so that she'd pass. When the teacher found out that we were friends, she called my mom to tell her that Jessica was a bad influence and my mom should keep me away from her. I guess not everyone shared my love for Jessica's free spirit.

But Jessica was loyal to the end. She would have done anything for me. When I did stupid things, even in high school when we were no longer "friends" she went above and beyond for me when I needed her.

And it hit me today that she reminds me of someone. Reread that first paragraph before you read this next one...

My daughter is a bit of a free spirit. She announced this year that, despite being called this for the past 7 years of her life, she would no longer be Elexa. She is now to be called Lexie. When she's angry or upset, you know it. She loves doing what she calls "projects" and is constantly saving things for her "projects." She traced her name in permanent ink on the personalized Pottery Barn backpack we bought for her. I see a girl with a neat pony tail get on the bus each morning, but the girl who gets off the bus has her hair flying in the wind. Elexa is pretty sure that everything in her life is optional, based on what she thinks is right.

And that is why my beautiful daughter can frustrate the life out of me, the mommy. But me, the person, thinks she is just awesome. I love her. I like her. I'm so glad she's my daughter because she challenges me every day. I'm so glad I know her because, like Jessica, she is loyal and amazing. I can't wait to get to know her even more as she grows up.